


adventures as the village two wheel device for pale and ashen quadrants

by lady_of_space



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drabble, F/F, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Pesterlog, Self-Indulgent, Short, Trollian, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 09:51:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6951529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lady_of_space/pseuds/lady_of_space
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vriska attempts to have a casual conversation with Kanaya. They both fail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	adventures as the village two wheel device for pale and ashen quadrants

\--arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] at 16:13--

AG: Well, heeeeeeeello, my a8solute 8EST meddlesome replacement lusus friend! 

AG: How are you on this FINE evening? 

GA: I Dont Want To Alarm You But It Is Well Past Sunrise Vriska 

GA: Are You Quite Alright 

AG: 8luh! Of course I'm alright! I'm practically sweating good thoughts, Kanaya! 

AG: Why do you always have to go full-on m8rnal figure whenever I try to have fun? ::::( 

GA: To Be Completely Fair Im Never Completely Sure Of Your Motives And As The Only Reasonable Member Of Your Romantic Escapades I Find It My Duty To Keep You At Least Slightly Stable 

AG: What is that supposed to mean? I'm totally sta8le, thank you very much, fussy fangs. 

AG: And trust me, 8eing pale hardly counts as a romantic relationship. ::::) 

GA: Huh 

GA: As Eridan Lovingly Put It I Guess I Am Destined To Forever Be In The Pale Zone 

AG: No offense, Kanaya, 8ut your whole 'Let Me Help You' thing isn't really endearing in a flushed or pitch way. 

AG: Actually it's kind of annoying…….. 

AG: May8e if you stopped 8eing so nice, you could get a kismesis! 

GA: I Dont Really Want A Kismesis To Be Completely Honest 

GA: I Dont Rival Anyone Or Want To Prove Myself As The Better Hand 

GA: I Would Appreciate A Healthy Matespritship But No One Has Ever Reciprocated My Emotions Even In The Flushed Sense 

AG: You've 8een redflirting? Give me the details immedi8ly! 

GA: Im Not Sure I Feel Completely Comfortable Relinquishing That Information Under The Current Circumstances 

GA: However If We Are To Stay On Topic Do You Happen To Have Anyone Who You Are Pining For 

AG: Ew, no! That's so GROSS!!!!!!!! 

AG: Like everyone who is availa8le isn't...I don't know, attractive? Physically and mentally. 

AG: Let me 8e str8 with you, Maryam: everyone is just pathetic and I don't feel inclined to even LOOK at these nook8oogers. 

AG: Like, who could I even d8 without throwing up? 

GA: You Already Are Hatedating Ampora 

GA: Im Not Sure Why You Consider Your Standards To Be So High 

AG: Not cool, Kanaya. ::::( 

GA: Sorry Do Continue 

AG: Anyway, Eridan is so pathetic that I REALLY h8 him, so it's okay. 

AG: Like, I don't have even remotely red feelings a8out anyone. 

AG: If anything, I'm pitch for everyone, even you! 

AG: 8ut you know, we're pale, and as previously mentioned, you're like the nice version of Spidermom, and I don't want to 8e Troll Oedipus. 

AG: So........it would totally NEVER work out 8etween us. 

AG: Thank Gog for moirails, right? 

GA: I 

GA: I Guess 

AG: That's the spirit! I'm glad you understand, 8ecause otherwise this entire relationship would go down the load gaper. 

AG: …….. 

AG: Maryam? 

GA: I Have To Go 

“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” you murmur, curling your hands into fists and shutting down your husktop. Before you know it, you're sobbing like a newly pupated wiggler, and not even your lusus can calm you down.

**Author's Note:**

> idk what i'm doing with my life


End file.
